Saturday, May 18, 2024

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葡萄樹傳媒

「放棄」不應該出現在我們的詞彙中──‘QUIT’ HAS NO PLACE IN OUR VOCABULARY

For English version, please refer to the latter part of this page

幾年前,美國密西根州的一支高中橄欖球隊在賽季進行到0勝4負,且在賽季初期未能得到任何一分後,就取消了賽季的後五場比賽。未獲勝利且未能得分是不好受的,但真的讓我心痛的,是想到有人放棄了那群運動員。

想像一下那些運動員將永遠無法體驗到可能的勝利,我不是指場上的勝利。根據報導,這支球隊可能最終會以0勝9負的戰績結束。然而,持久的勝利不在於記分板上的分數,也不在於勝負。重要的是這些運動員未能在本賽季體驗到人生的勝利。我想教練和體育官員可能從未聽過著名的溫斯頓·邱吉爾的名言:「絕不,絕不,絕不,絕不,絕不屈服,絕不屈服,除了對於榮譽和智慧的信念外,不管是巨大的還是微小的、是重要的還是瑣碎的,不向任何事物低頭。」對他來說,「放棄」就像是一個不敬的言詞。

二十年後,這些運動員也許會希望他們的教練,那時沒有放棄他們。即使他們當時沒有獲勝,也沒有得分,但它本可以成為一個塑造品格的關鍵時刻。

不幸的是,放棄已經滲透到社會的許多領域,包括商業和專業的領域。人們未考慮到可能的影響就直接放棄,我認為應該將這個詞從我們的詞彙中刪除。我不僅把它視為詛咒詞,而且它也會成為那些奉行它的人的咒詛。

我永遠不會忘記,在一次青少年運動員退修會上,與一位16歲男孩的對話。休息時他獨自坐著,雙手托著頭。好似有什麼困擾著他,所以我前去坐在他身邊,希望能夠有所幫助。我只是簡單的問他:「怎麼了?」通常,我對年輕人常遇到的問題是有所預備的,異性問題、酗酒藥物問題、友誼關係問題或學校課業問題。 所以當他說:「我痛恨我的父母,讓我放棄所有我開始的一切。」的時候,我感到很震驚。

這位年輕人繼續解釋他開始的每個事物,他都放棄。然後他突然說道:「我真的只希望,他們能讓我完成所有我開始的事情。」哇 ! 與我通常聽到的「我痛恨我的父母,要我完成所有我開始的一切。」正好相反。而這位有抱負的運動員是希望得到鼓勵,而不是放棄。

聖經明確談到了不放棄的重要性,以及堅決面對任何形式的逆境。「我的弟兄們,你們落在百般試煉中,都要以為大喜樂;因為知道你們的信心經過試驗,就生忍耐。但忍耐也當成功,使你們成全、完備,毫無缺欠。」(雅各書1章2-4節)

我們的家庭、團隊、企業、組織、教會和學校應該是培養「堅持到底的精神」-並且是出色地完成任務的地方。在我們的談話中「放棄」一詞應該從我們的對話中刪除。使徒保羅在加拉太書6章9節中提醒我們:我們行善,不可喪志;若不灰心,到了時候就要收成。」

我們每個人都會被他人認定,要不就是完成者,不然就是放棄者。選擇在於我們自己,而兩者之間的不同是因上帝在困難和壓力中,模造和形塑我們。如果在事情變得困難時我們就放棄,我們將會錯失祂在我們生命中所要做的事。

Dan Britton是一位作家、教練和培訓師,擔任基督徒運動員團契的主要官員,領導著在100多個國家中的成千上萬名工作人員。Britton曾與巴爾的摩雷霆(Baltimore Thunder)的職業橄欖球隊一起比賽,並與其他合著了八本書,包括《One Word》、《WisdomWalks》和《Called to Greatness》。他經常為公司、非營利組織和體育團隊演講。Dan和他的妻子Dawn居住在堪薩斯州奧弗蘭帕克(Overland Park),育有三名已婚子女和一名孫女。

挑戰思考

有時我們面臨的障礙似乎幾乎難以克服。我們可能會感到氣餒,這意味著失去了繼續前進、堅持下去的勇氣。在這種時候,我們都可以從關心我們、並在困難中支持我們的人身上受益。當你需要鼓勵時,你可以求助於誰呢?可以是個人,也可以是你知道他們一心為你著想的一小群人。今天就開始找出他們,決心公開分享你所面臨的困難。同樣地,請考慮一下今天你如何成為需要鼓勵的人的支持者。

備註:如果你有聖經,想閱讀更多相關的經文,請參考:(因篇幅有限,請參閱未列出的經文:羅馬書5:3-5、哥林多前書15:58、彼得前書1:6-7)

耶利米書 29 章11-14節
29:11耶和華說:我知道我向你們所懷的意念是賜平安的意念,不是降災禍的意念,要叫你們末後有指望。
29:12你們要呼求我,禱告我,我就應允你們。
29:13你們尋求我,若專心尋求我,就必尋見。
29:14耶和華說:我必被你們尋見,我也必使你們被擄的人歸回,將你們從各國中和我所趕你們到的各處招聚了來,又將你們帶回我使你們被擄掠離開的地方。這是耶和華說的。
羅馬書8章35-39節
8:35誰能使我們與基督的愛隔絕呢?難道是患難嗎?是困苦嗎?是逼迫嗎?是飢餓嗎?是赤身露體嗎?是危險嗎?是刀劍嗎?
8:36如經上所記:我們為你的緣故終日被殺;人看我們如將宰的羊。
8:37然而,靠著愛我們的主,在這一切的事上已經得勝有餘了。
8:38因為我深信無論是死,是生,是天使,是掌權的,是有能的,是現在的事,是將來的事,
8:39是高處的,是低處的,是別的受造之物,都不能叫我們與神的愛隔絕;這愛是在我們的主基督耶穌裡的。

反省與問題討論

  1. 你是否曾經放棄某件事情後,之後對那個決定後悔了呢?當時的情況是如何 ? 你認為自己原本可以更好地處理嗎?如果你當時沒有放棄,可能會發生什麼事情?
  2. 你認為為什麼當事情變得艱難時,人們對選擇放棄變得如此普遍呢?
  3. 你能想到任何人,也許甚至是你自己,因為情況變得困難而想要放棄嗎?你可以如何回應,鼓勵他們(或自己)除去「放棄」這個詞,取而代之是不屈不撓、專注、韌性和耐力等品格呢?
  4. 引用的聖經經文,說出上帝使用試煉和逆境來塑造我們的品格,使我們成為具有信心、盼望和決心的人。你相信這一點嗎?請解釋你的答案。


‘QUIT’ HAS NO PLACE IN OUR VOCABULARY

By Dan Britton

Several years ago, a high school football team in Michigan, U.S.A. cancelled the last five games of its season after going 0–4 and having not scored a point at the start of the season. Going winless and scoreless has a sting to it, but my heart hurts thinking that someone gave up on that group of athletes.

Think about the possible victories those athletes will never experience. I do not mean to on-the-field victories. From what was reported, the team probably would have finished 0–9. However, lasting victories are not about points on a scoreboard, or wins and losses. What matters are the life victories the athletes were not able to experience this season. I suppose the coaches and athletic officials had never heard the famous Winston Churchill quote, “Never give in – never, never, never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in….” For him, “quit” was a four-letter profanity.

Twenty years from now, those athletes might be wishing their coaches had not given up on them. Even if they had gone winless and scoreless, it could have been a defining moment that developed character.

Unfortunately, quitting is something that has permeated many segments of society, including the business and professional world. People quit without giving any thought to possible repercussions. I believe the word needs to be removed from our vocabulary. Not only do I see it as a curse word, but it also becomes a curse to all who live by it.

I will never forget the conversation I had with a 16-year-old boy during a young athletes’ retreat. During free time, he was sitting by himself, his head in his hands. Something was troubling him, so I sat by him hoping to help. I simply asked, “What’s wrong?”  I was prepared for a typical young person’s response: girlfriend problems; alcohol or drugs; friendship struggles, or issues at school. So, I was shocked when he said, “I hate that my parents let me quit everything I start.”

The young man proceeded to explain that everything he started, he quit. He then blurted out, “I just wish they would make me finish what I started.” Wow! Usually I hear the exact opposite, “I hate that my parents make me finish everything I start.” But this aspiring athlete wanted encouragement not to quit.

The Bible clearly addresses the importance of not quitting, of determining to confront adversity in whatever form it takes. “Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing” (James 1:2–4).

Our families, teams, businesses, organizations, churches, and schools should be places for cultivating a spirit of finishing – and finishing well. The four-letter word, “Quit,” should be eliminated from our conversations. The apostle Paul reminds us in Galatians 6:9 the reward of not quitting: “So let us not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.”

We each will become known by others as either a finisher or a quitter. The choice is ours, but the difference between the two is life-changing. Because it is in the struggle and strain that God shapes us and molds us. We will miss out on what He is trying to do in our lives if we quit when things get hard.

Dan Britton is a writer, coach and trainer who serves as the Chief Field Officer with the Fellowship of Christian Athletes and leads thousands of staff in over 100 countries. Britton played professional lacrosse with the Baltimore Thunder and has coauthored eight books, including: One Word, WisdomWalks, and Called to Greatness. He is a frequent speaker for companies, non-profits and sports teams. Dan and his wife, Dawn, reside in Overland Park, Kansas, and have three married children and a granddaughter.

Reflection/Discussion Questions

  1. Have you ever quit something and later regretted that decision? What was the situation and how do you think you could have handled it better? What might have happened if you had not quit?
  2. Why do you think it has become such a common option for people to quit when, as they say, “the going gets tough”?
  3. Can you think of anyone – perhaps even yourself – who is being tempted to quit because circumstances have become difficult? How might you respond by encouraging them (or yourself) to discard the word “quit” and replace it with qualities such as perseverance, dedication, resilience, and endurance?
  4. The Bible verses cited indicate God uses trials and adversity to shape our character and to change us into people of faith, hope, and determination? Do you believe this? Why or why not?

NOTE: If you have a Bible and would like to read more, consider the following passages:
Jeremiah 29:11-14; Romans 5: 3-5, 8:35-39; 1Corinthians 15:58; 1 Peter 1:6-7

Challenge

Sometimes the obstacles we face seem almost insurmountable. We can become discouraged, which means to lose the courage to continue, to persevere. At such times we all can benefit from people who care for us and will support us through difficulties. Who can you turn to when you need to be encouraged? It could be an individual, or a small group of people you know have your best interests at heart. Identify them today and resolve to openly share struggles you are facing. Similarly, consider today how you can serve as a resource for someone who needs encouragement.



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